The Cow of Justice Ditty

The Cow of Justice – An analogy of how the law arrives at justice
I was talking my legal frustrations over with a friend, a retired judge of sorts and he gave me an analogy of the law as below, he acknowledges that very often the law does not work.

Imagine a cow (and right now I can) Pulling at the head you have the solicitors, Pulling on the tail you have the claimants and Pulling on the cow’s teats are the Judges. The teats are meant to dispense or serve justice.

My analogy would place the respective players differently
Holding the head would be the Judges, Hanging on to the tail are the Claimants, trying to avoid the cow sh*t as it fell and Pulling at the teats are the Solicitors, milking the Cow for all they could get out of it.

Eventually the poor cow would die owing to the judges hanging on to the cows head and forgetting, or not being strong enough, to direct the cow to eat. And that is how justice died!

A Ditty to the above
Hey diddle didle, the cow’s in the middle, the claimants hanging on to its tail
Were in search of the law the judge cried aloud,the solicitor said goody oh how can we fail
The claimant impressed by this austere declaration, he marvelled at people of such ilk
The judge looked around, the solicitor had gone, for he had run away with the milk!

On his way to the door, the solicitor fell to the floor, got covered in sh*t where he lay
The judge snorted out loud, he imagined a crowd and cried there will be no justice today
He declared a mis-trial, the claimant stunned in denial, cheered and shouted hip hip hooray!