Payback is a Bitch!
Just to set the scene, had an upsetting couple of weeks, couple of funerals, one of those Sandra’s mum and had been struggling to sleep some evenings/mornings, as can happen at difficult times.
So on Monday I got up at 4 0’clock and coming down the stairs noticed a plastic bag sat on top of my bottles of wine and got curious. On checking found that it was a world cup football that Sandra’s mum had got Sandra to purchase for Coben’s Christmas present. Had a moment on that.
Also noticed that the wine boxes had been opened and on further inspection, only 1 bottle of wine was left in the box of the white that I particularly enjoy. I knew the culprit as this happens frequently with the white wine and was irritated however was pre-occupied with other thoughts.
A lot of discussion on various issues had taken place with the Culprit over the 30 months that she had lived with us and to my mind, she was not listening, if she was she certainly was not taking any notice of the points being made. Can be a tad frustrating!
Life can be terribly fair some times in terms of giving us opportunities, that is if we know we want an opportunity and can then see the opportunity and once seen, accept a cost to take the opportunity.
So it goes like this, I got a great night’s sleep on Tuesday and I came down the stairs this morning and noticed a plastic bag sat on top of my bottles of wine and got curious. Now hold on, no it’s not Deja vous and no, I have not duplicated the typing. Rather I am savouring the moment before I describe the opportunity that had presented itself.
I knew that this was a different bag so had a peek and on checking found a cake in a Marks and Spencer’s bag, and was now curious. I asked Sandra why she had bought me a cake (Did you see what I did there?) and she advised me that Samantha, who shall remain known as the culprit had bought the cake.
Why did she buy me that I asked rather hopefully, because it was a nice cake and I wanted it. Of course I knew that it was not for me and Sandra knew it was not for her. We knew it would be for some friend for some erroneous reason. Basically an excuse to socialise and eat, what had become in my mind, my cake! I had a lot to do so with disappointment, moved off to get on with the day.
Sandra and I always try to have a coffee to discuss the day before the madness of running our small business descends upon us. So we are both now enjoying a coffee out in the sun and pondering the loss of our cake, stolen from us by that ungrateful culprit and ding a light goes on!
Kind of at exactly the same time we had the same thought, why not buy another cake and cut some out and leave it for the culprit to see and basically let it progress from there and see what happens. Man the air will be thick with the expletive laden version of, oh my, I am upset!
Now Sandra and I are very laid back individuals who would rather not be noticed in a crowd, would help anyone and are very decent people however! Have you noticed that there is always a however with people. Ours is that we both have a wicked sense of humour that we like to enjoy strategically and Wow! A great thought, could be fun and very appropriate. We may not survive this but it will be funny.
The opportunity is seen but can we now ensure that the ingredients are in place to ensure that we can conclude this little scheme. We were certainly prepared to accept the cost of the opportunity but could we guide it in our direction. More to the point is, did Marks and Spencer’s have another cake?
We tried ringing them to check if they had a spare cake but what unbelievably poor service, was directed to a call centre and they just could not be bothered. As an aside, do retail companies not understand that a call centre or an FAQ on a website is not offering service? It’s just paying lip service to customer support on the cheap. They must be working on an app too as that will greatly improve the customer shopping experience. Really! One of the real reasons behind why the high streets are dying. I digress.
Long story short jumped in the car, drove to Doncaster and with trepidation walked to the cake area in the bakery section and oh my, there is a god, there was my cake. This was the last one so with all senses now at peak performance in order to grab my cake and fight off anyone who wanted to steal my cake from me, just like the culprit had done, I wandered over to the till and paid for it. Said hi to Janet who served me.
So the opportunity has been paid for and now we have to set the scene!
What we thought was if we cut a quarter of the cake out of our cake and wrap it up and then leave our cake out for the culprit to casually bump into, which would do nicely. The culprit’s cake will be stashed in her bag in a cupboard.
Looking beyond the initial reaction, we thought that we should offer the quarter cake back to her if she gets upset as a means of pacifying her and soothing her troubled mind that is of course, after she has lost it!
Of course the culprit can have her own cake back after our bit of fun and retribution for drinking the wine, lol. I am certain that there is a clever pun here about having your cake and eating it, but it won’t show itself.
We wonder what will happen next. We will report back, that is if we survive.
